Do you believe in fate?

Tonight I watched “Sliding doors” for the first time since I saw it back in the nineties.  I had liked it then.  Now I see the faults.  The poor acting, the poor editing, the dated music… However the concept of parallel lives that end in the same fate through different paths, interests me. 

Do I think it possible?  I don’t think so.

Think about the people around you that mean the most.  Those that aren’t tied to you by blood.  If events had occurred differently do you think you would have met them anyway?

I can only look at my own circumstance. 

If I had taken the first teaching job that was offered to me, I would never have gone to country Victoria and met Stuart.  

If I had not applied for that job, or won that job, how would I have met him?

If he had left to go back to his family in Warrnambool. 

If he had not been coerced into doing that musical.

If I had not agreed to help out with that musical.

If I didn’t call him.

If he hadn’t answered

If I had thrown him out 

If he had left.

There are so many factors involved in our every day lives, who is to know when one action may change the entire direction of it.  

The question still stands though.  If all of it had never happened, would something else have drawn us together anyway?

Believing such a thing sounds incredibly egotistical.  Believing that you are so important that the world will turn a certain way in order for you to meet the right people?

Fate is lazy.  Fate is believing you don’t have to try.  Fate is accepting that what happens to you was meant to be.  

Meant to be.  

What does that mean?  

Again it is so egotistical to think that what happens to one person is so significant in the scheme of everything, that it was actually “Meant to be”.

I am not saying I don’t value myself, or my contribution to the world.  I do.  It is the fact that I make what happens to me “happen”.

When we consider how much in our lives we have control over, there is much that we can decide, that we can change, that we determine.  Of course there are exceptions of people born into situations where the control and the choices they have are more limited.

However my choice has been limited mainly by my own decisions.  I don’t believe my fate is pre-determined.  I don’t believe there is a path mapped out just for me.  I have the ability to change the course of my life at any point.  

There are however factors I do not have control over, and these factors can change everything at any time.  It is then that the idea of fate becomes a comforting thought.  The idea that “this change was not in my plans, but let’s run with it, because there is some force that is pushing us in this direction for a reason”.  That is it isn’t it.  That we all want to believe there is a reason for our existence.  That is why fate is such a tempting comfort.

Perhaps I would have met him.  Our paths would cross somewhere.  It is a romantic notion to think that our union was written in the stars.  

Hollywood has a lot to answer for…

Gwyneth eat something.

3 thoughts on “Fate?

  1. I agree with everything here. We are responsible for our own destiny. I’ve always found it comforting that the universe is so much larger than me. I feel there’s a lot more freedom for me to grow in that kind of space. I think a lot of people find it intimidating, though – hence, ‘fate’.

  2. Excellent post. I embrace the idea of just how big the universe is, that I have so many choices in how to experience it, and I am so grateful for all of the amazing experiences and opportunities I have had, the love I have received, and the good that has embraced me.

    • I suppose if we look at it the other way… If our lives were awful… We could blame “fate”. Perhaps because of our fortunate circumstances we are happy to believe we have steered ourselves in this direction…

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