Holidays are over

The end of our summer holiday is coming to a close. Conflicting feelings are emerging into an irritation I can’t explain.
I am ready to go back to work. I need more mental stimulation, routine and let’s face it, money. But I am not sure I am ready to give up everything else I find so pleasurable during the holidays.
These have been different holidays for us. A big move back home and other crazy moments that have eaten our time, but it has been good to be together. I feel like I really know my children. I feel I have spent more time with them than with anyone else these past six weeks. Most of this has been positive, but as the time comes to an end, their ability to amuse themselves and cope with the company of each other and me, is showing limitations. Although they are too scared to say “I’m bored”, because I will give them a job to do, sweeping the pergola, cleaning out the car, weeding the garden, etc. I know that this is what they are often thinking. We have spent much time at home especially lately. At least they will be looking forward to going to school.
I remember feeling that way when I was young. I couldn’t wait for school to start, so that I might do something more interesting than being at home. Not that we stayed home every holiday, but days always feel longer when activities are limited. That was the first sign I had that I was getting older. The holidays were too short.
Now the holidays are getting longer (does that mean I am getting younger) and I almost want them to end so that the kids can be entertained, but that also means that I am back at work. That I have to do what I feel so out of practise in doing.
Today my head was full of mazes that have no end as I attempted to decipher the curriculum that I will be teaching this year. I know I will be fine, but I want to be organised and certain that I am doing what is right.
So the end of sleep ins and lazy days as I embark on the old, but new and my children find an end to boredom, at least for a little while.


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